Fear vs. Excitement

counting days....june is about to end. I'm certain that no matter how challenging july would be, there will always be familiar faces that will help me. I don't know how it feels like to be in an operating room(well, i know how it feels like be there as a circulating or surgical nurse but not as the patient). yes, im afraid. seriously, i dont have the courage to imagine myself lying in an O.R table. The fear that im feeling doubles everytime i think about DELIVERY ROOM wherein i will go through each stages of labor with so much pain. I wouldn't want to spend 6 hours or more with presence of pain. I am not used to it and this will be my first time to give birth. By all means, i wouldnt want to get hurt. On the other hand, giving birth is one of the precious things you'll experience and seeing your baby will bring you comfort after the long hours of enduring pain. I wonder how it feels like to hold a tiny hands and toes.:) it must be something that is very new to me since i was always the baby girl. I don't know how can I be prepared enough for the upcoming delivery, whatever it takes, i know God is always with me.:) Goodluck to me and to my family as we move forward in another chapter of our lives(having a little boy in our house would be fun and challenging).^^,